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Bad Car Paint Jobs

Customised paint jobs.  They can be a fun way of personalising your car and making it look one of a kind.  One of my husband’s friends has given his station wagon a customised home-made paint job, all in camouflage.  He made a pretty good job of it and it’s good to be able to spot that car trawling around town and know at a distance that there goes Trev. OK, the camo job would have been even more appropriate on a big 4×4 – a Jeep, for example. Except then people would think it was the military in town.

Not all customised paint jobs go so well. Some are absolute shockers, and I don’t just mean because the paint job was done at home with a paint brush and leftover roof paint.  The paint may have been applied well and evenly, but what has been painted on the car is tasteless, garish or tacky.  Thankfully, the place I’ve seen these most often has been online rather than in the actual metal – with the probably exception of some of those Wicked Campers campervans that sometimes have some rather adult humour painted all over them – not what you want to be stuck behind with a car full of children who are old enough to read but too young to really have that sort of thing shoved in their face (right, stop the rant there).

So steel yourselves.  Here comes the hall of shame.  You have been warned…

Fake bloodstains to make it look as though you’re a homicidal maniac behind the wheel. Or a tampon on wheels.  I feel sick.


Lovely classic Rolls-Royce. The yellow would have been an insult enough to such a fine piece of engineering but the Gypsy/Indian artwork?


What have they done to this poor Beetle?

badly painted beetle

If you drive this Mini, don’t expect to impress any woman with even half a brain. It makes me want to yell “Grow up!”


Apparently, this leopard-print Audi R8 is the latest folly of Justin Bieber, replacing the mirror-plated wheels of the past. Audi owners, start weeping now.


Part of me confesses to almost liking what they did to this Honda. Almost.

tiger honda

This is not Smart at all.

pink smart

This isn’t a Smart idea either, although the BMW  bike beats Hello Kitty hands down.

smart with BMW bike.

Mercy on us… time for Goodbye, Kitty.

hello kitty car 2

Another one that gets the reaction “Grow up!” The actual paintwork looks badly done into the bargain.  Where did I put that sick bucket?

toilet car

What is this woman thinking? It’s got to be a woman in this car… surely?


Stop, stop!  Enough already!  Time for some relief in the form of paint jobs that are different (to say the least) but at least show a touch of imagination and a sense of humour.

As advertising for a zoo goes, this eye catching bus is a winner.


Here’s hoping the dorsal fin helps the aerodynamics.

orca paint job

This might not be to everyone’s taste but would be good for a professional florist.

floral car

Garish and over the top, but this road hog Beetle puts a smile on a few people’s faces.

road hog beetle